ただいま。。。

(meaning 'I'm back!' in Japanese)
Well, I'm back, like I say - blogging truthfully hasn't been the first thing on my mind (not that it ever was to begin with, but you know what I mean), and I've been swamped with work.
I kind of don't know where to begin with updating everyone on what I've been doing, part of the reason I'm writing this is a vent, and part of it is because I haven't blogged in forever.

I guess I'll start with the good stuff. Nice things that have happened to me recently. Like getting most of my work done; I've only got one more piece of coursework due in in May - rest of this is all just revising for exams now, which isn't much fun, but I've got a bit less pressure on my shoulders than I did.
I've also been planning for a doll I'm hoping to get this summer - Hazel and I have had this massive LTF order planned for ages, and whilst two dolls doesn't really qualify as massive to most, it's big to us, and we've had Kenji (mine) and Seiji (Hazel's) planned since last summer!! Two adorable LTF Bisou twins <3 I can't wait!

Also, I finally sat down and started playing The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim properly, and now I see what everyone's raving about. It's amazing! Makes me wish I hadn't traded Oblivion in =( but once I'm done with Skyrim, I'll get it again and play through it.
I'm currently playing as a High Elf called Meldiron, but I have plans to also play through the game as a Khajiit and a Dark Elf - one of them has to be female, since I always play as boys :L

I swear that 'The Ghost of Saint Valentine' by Bayside is my song right now. It really describes how I'm feeling at the moment, mainly because I've started liking a friend of mine as more than just a friend. Which is bad enough because I don't do well with romance and expressing my feelings for people. What makes it even worse is, before I started having feelings for him, I was helping him get set up with the girl he DOES like. I'm still helping him with that, because, whilst I am jealous AS HELL of this girl, I don't see why my feelings should get in the way of him being happy. He doesn't like me that way. That's it. There's nothing I can do about that. And I don't want to lose his friendship. I just want him to be happy.
You'd think that'd be enough. But of course I can't just shove my own feelings to one side. I'm jealous, absolutely. Sad, definitely. Kicking myself for falling for him, like you wouldn't believe.
So I'm just going to do what I've always done. Channel it into my art... That's all I can do...
Why do I always fall for people who are never going to like me back? It's like a curse!

Anyway, I guess that's my update =) Any PSN-ers, the username is KawaiiSamurai if you want to add me =P, and Skyrimmers, what's your character? =D

Peace,
Clair